I am a list-maker.
I love a good list.
I even write things on the list that I have already done that day…just so as I can cross them off my list. I sit on my bed after my shower and gaze into my wardrobe. I’m thinking about what i will wear and in what order I will get dressed. I am all about having an action plan.. and theme music.
When you have a plan (and Eye of the Tiger playing in the background) then you OWN doing the dishes, you attack the pile of clothes and you are a force that all dust and dirt must be reckoned with.
I think maybe there should be more purpose in parenting.
A little bit more offense than defense.
A little bit more training and modelling than discipline and damage control.
What if you had goals for your children? Like, not just the general goals of, “you know, happy and healthy and stuff.” Not just thinking, well obviously I want them to be good kids. But what if you sat down and said….
Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control.
What if, you assessed these fruits of the spirit in your own life – looked at how you model gentleness and self-control. What if there was purposeful training of your children in these things.
Wouldn’t that flow onto and into their behaviour?
Do I want my kids to not bully the kids next door, because they are not allowed to… or do I want them to have learned and seen kindness displayed in our family and our relationships?
Do I want them to not steal from the jar of marshmallows (It’s a pretty big jar…and i like the pink ones) because they are scared of getting caught? – or because they have self-control and goodness?
I definitely have rules and boundaries in my home for my children and there are consequences if they are broken. But more than well-behaved, I want my children rooted and sustained by scripture. There is purpose to my parenting that goes beyond surviving each day… especially those days.
There has to be graciousness in my parenting – which is hardest to do when it is most needed. There needs to be purpose.
I look at my 2yr old and see a need for kindness in her. So I pray for kindness in my own life, in my own day, that I can model and show it to her. I seek ways to encourage and train her in kindness.
I think that is the key to her being the kind of 2yr old that doesnt bully her neighbour anymore.
What goals do you want for your kids? What can you train them in this week?
Can you go a week without raising your voice in anger?
Do you model prayer and scripture to your children?
Can you show them appreciation and gratitude for all that they accomplish?
Do you show self-control over your temptations and cravings?
Are the prayers for your children – visible in the life you are modelling for them?
I know that whenever I look at my children and think about their ‘training’ – I am always convicted of my ‘modelling’.